I received exciting news earlier this week that a piece I wrote for CPE (clinical pastoral education) was selected to be posted on the Unitarian Universalist Association’s WorshipWeb. (This site is a great resource for UUs to share their writing/music/art for worship and to just connect with what others are doing in worship.
It had to be edited a teeny bit to remove some ableist wording (glad this was brought to my attention!)
Anyway, I’m sharing the piece as a link here, enjoy!:
If I could show you God,
I’d show you in 1s and 0s,
I’d evoke the divine
In binary,
I’d show you how the great machine,
That is itself a contradiction,
Is itself a part of the unknowable,
Infinite, infinity that is,
That realistically should not even be,
The holy is all that is,
In, of and composing existence,
And you are
holy,
Made of,
and in the everything
And made even more sacred
By being the only 1 of you,
Too made of 1s and 0s of the divine,
The holy, holy,
H01y
I am attending a family gathering. A memorial/ independence day gathering of my maternal side. Of all the things running through my mind, one that has popped up a number of times is how to describe my UU faith and ministry to my largely Lutheran family.
I need an elevator speech of sorts. I’ve been saying that I’ll get to coming up with one for some time now, but never get around to doing it.
I’ve been in the car for hours and hours on the road trip from Maine to Ohio and now to western Pennsylvania. I’m a passenger, and I see no time but now to do it!
I think first about all the things that I believe…..
I believe in a universal, neutral force that one might call God, or my preferred “Spirit”.
I believe in panentheism, this Spirit is, is in, and is greater than all.
I believe in God’s love for all.
I believe in the inherent worth and dignity of all.
I believe in the interconnection of all things.
I believe in an interwoven web of life.
I believe God’s intervening force in our lives, but not that all is preordained.
I believe in the continuation of spirit after death, in a cycle as part of the Divine Spirit.
I believe…
I believe a lot things that are a lot to explain. I believe things that not all Unitarian Universalists believe. But my faith has belief that we can hold these views and seek out truth and meaning.
I struggle with how to describe this all succinctly.
Then I saw a description someone else did, that was a one liner. I can’t even recall what it was, but it made sense. And suddenly I came up with it:
“I believe in 1 God that connects and fills all, and in which all are saved.”
From this description, Unitarian and Universalists views are both expressed. Unitarian: all in one God. Universalist: Never mind the name given, the language or faith praised with, all for this one whole God.
There is much more that could be expressed about my faith, and own spirituality. But this short statement captures the crux of the faith. I can then expand, and talk about the non-creedal nature, the 7 (8) Principles that help to guide and explain our beliefs.
I’m sure I will tweak my elevator statement over time and with use. But for now I’m satisfied with this. I think being able to come up with such a statement is a Testament to how much I’ve grown in my faith and ministry.
I also think I’m ready for the family….
I am here and humbled
By my small body,
By my tiny imprint on the fingerprint of the divine plan,
I am hard of bringing myself to bent knees,
To folded hands,
To ask,
For anything,
For who am I to ask?
Who am I to expect?
then I am reminded,
I am
inherently worthy,
Worthy
As any other being,
And I am part of this web,
Interconnected by nature,
And my part is too important,
In ways I’ll may never know,
May never understand
And so,
Humble, worthy, interconnected
I fall to knees with fingers clasped:
Dear spirit, great being of existence,
That in, of, around and composing us,
I ask for your help,
Influence in my favor,
To make and show me
the best path forth,
I ask you to make it be,
That which includes the greatest good
Even that I might not understand
Now
The greatest good
For me and family
That our place in this web be filled with peace
And the good of your divine presence,
So humbly for this I pray.
Amen.
This is my home altar space. It has slowly developed over a time, of collecting what I initially saw as small trinkets. Really I was building a small temple for my spirituality.
I don’t fit neatly in anyway in a “what are you?” box. This altar could look like that of many different faiths, which is truly what I channel. But in the end it makes sense as a Unitarian Universalist. I am content in this spirituality, which I long searched to understand and find.
Though it is modest, and a tad busy (with limited space), I invite you in to the outer workings of my eclectic spirituality.
Welcome!
The days have become shorter, with darkness descending sooner and a chill now in the air. Summer days have come to a close, leaves now glow orange, red, and yellow like a seasonal flame. This shift in days, shift in temperature marks a shift in the cycle of the year. All these changes note a time when the veil between this world and the hereafter is the thinnest, this 31st of October. Samhain, as it is called marks the Pagan celebration of the time when harvest has been collected and those departed are with us closer than ever, again.
Samhain, celebrated generically in the US as Halloween, has always been my favorite holiday of the year. Even as a child it was not about the candy, or the games, but rather about a certain distinct feel in the air. This year Samhain comes with much more solemnity than in previous years, for me. This summer my grandma, Verna Hoffman, passed away unexpectedly. While this is not the first person whom I have lost, it is the closest relation to whom I have had to say goodbye. My grandmother is now among the company of other departed relations, who I love and miss, like my great Aunt Barb. Both women were strong, beloved individuals, with colorful and formidable personalities. Their corporeal presence may be missing, but now, especially as felt on this day, their spirits dwell close, and their memories are renewed.
My great Aunt Barb was a loving woman, full of life and commitment to family. An amazing cook, I recall the fragrant smell of her home, and the open motherly presence that she bestowed. Most of my memories of her were as a small child, but they lasted. I came to know later that her love was also an acceptance of me and my biracial family, when few in our small town did. I dreamt about her once when I was in college. The dream was out of the ordinary for me, but was one of comfort that brought forth warm memories of my childhood in her company. Days later, a call from my mother informed me that Aunt Barb had died, at home in her bed. She was the first close relation that I had known to pass away, and thus introduced me to death. Her spirit remained a figure in my life. She is with me.
My grandma, Verna, was really a second mother to me. She left this world tragically as this Summer eclipsed. My memory of her is strong, both from the newness of her passing, and the powerful impression she made on my life. In early childhood my family resided in her home, and I came to know her care and comfort. She was a petite woman, a nurse by trade, and she brought this ethic of care and nurturing to every aspect of her life. In her memory I think of yellow citrine, warm sweaters, and the comforting aroma of dove cooling cream, and fill bodied hugs. Her imprint on me is present in most every moment of my life, from her influence on my spiritually, to how I clothe my person. She is with me.
As Samhain draws near I am comforted in the thought that we are closer to those in their celestial presence. When I am reminded of their memory I will know it is not just from fleeting thought, but from their presence by me.
This Samahain, may you feel the presence of those loved, but gone, brought nearer; spirits of those missed come close, and may you be nurtured and comforted by their memory and presence this day. They are with you.
Blessings on this sacred day of Samhain.
Rev. Vanessa Titang 