*A poem/reflection written in prayer on the challenge someone I know currently faces battling cancer.
There is nothing fair
About any of this,
Of children
That of which we are
Left to fend for themselves,
There is nothing fair about there being
An unknown
That is always shrouded in mystery;
Without answers
I can try to comfort you
And try I will,
I ask that you only take from it what you need,
Here is what I believe:
There is nothing “fair”
About the suffering you endure
And it is not an act of spite,
By the Divine;
The Divine
—A spirit so grand and yet still seeing your lifetime in its uniqueness
For the first time;
Spirit, an entity timeless
And endless
Thus, always in flux;
Knows even metamorphoses involve mutation,
At levels, we can not perceive;
The cosmos are so great and complex, and yet their workings are also part of and shaped by the microscopic;
Spirit may stir the workings,
Yet pain is but
A byproduct,
unintended,
This we may never rightly understand;
Breathe, dear one,
It is not fair,
Nor is it your fault,
In this moment, I can do nothing to absolve your hurting,
But I can be present
With you,
for you,
Holding you in this temporal comfort of embrace,
I can also say nothing,
For words are meaningless,
Being explained to one in a crucible;
As much as I can
I hold your pain
In my heart
In exchange with my love,
Love that is also an unending
Blessed gift of the Divine,
always,
And for all;
And still damnit No,
This
is not fair.
Rev. Vanessa Titang 